Erasmus and the Perils of Isolation: A Renaissance Perspective
Where would you turn if you felt lonely and isolated? It seems logical to seek out another human being, but for many of us, that idea feels foreign. It's not as simple as it should be, is it? It often feels easier to interact through a dating site, watch a YouTube video, or pick up a self-help book. In fact, around 700 million self-help books are sold globally each year! These books have been in mass production for over 500 years. In this video, I will explore the original self-help bestseller, written by Desiderius Erasmus in 1500, to gain some timeless advice for dealing with feelings of loneliness and disconnection. Specifically, I will unpack three wise ideas about connection from the Renaissance thinker, Desiderius Erasmus.
Erasmus and his buddy, Sir Thomas More in the sixteenth-century version of spilling the tea.
Erasmus was one of history’s most outstanding scholars. He sought to compile classical proverbs and created a collection of over 4,000 sayings, known as the “Adagia” or Adages. While he was a prolific writer, I believe that Adagia is more important than his more famous work dedicated to his friend Sir Thomas More, known for "A Man for All Seasons." Erasmus had a clear goal, driven by his desire for moral and spiritual renewal: to cultivate friendships and build a network of like-minded individuals who generously shared their insights.
The Adagia serves as a treasury of wisdom from friendly souls of the past. These individuals were not so different from us; they simply paid close attention to life and made valuable observations. Erasmus worked hard to uncover these gems, carefully preserving them for us. Each saying comes with its source, meaning, and practical application. Let’s take a look at three insights that can encourage us in our loneliness.
The First Insight: “True friendship is a rare thing.” Erasmus reminds us that real friends challenge us and enrich our lives rather than drain our energy. Authentic friendship is a divine gift, not a casual label.
We all need friends, yet we often struggle to understand what true friendship really means. Erasmus states, “Amicitia res rara” (“True friendship is a rare thing”). Have you ever wondered if you truly know what a friend is? A real friend is someone who may lay themselves on the line to confront us when we’re on a dangerous path, even if it risks upsetting us. They invest time in our lives, are present when they are with us, and together we uplift each other rather than simply depleting our energies. Erasmus warns us not to misuse the term “friend.” Many claim the title, but few actually embody it. He echoes Cicero’s “De Amicitia,” explaining that genuine friendship is a divine gift, not just a casual acquaintance. When you seek a friend, understand the depth of what you are asking for; it’s not about someone who never challenges you—such desires reflect a narcissistic tendency, which leads to an inability to be or have true friends.
The Second Insight: Isolation poses dangers: “Alone, either a king or a demon.” Erasmus cautions that solitude can lead to tyranny or madness. Without love and community, humanity can become monstrous.
While true friendship is rare, our need for friends is underscored by the dangers of isolation. Erasmus states, “Solus aut rex aut daemon” (“Alone, either a king or a demon”). On one hand, solitude can empower a tyrant; on the other, it can lead a person into despair and madness. For ordinary individuals, isolation is perilous. How serious is this threat?
Erasmus provides another adage: “Homo homini monstrum,” meaning “Man is a monster to man.” Without love and community, human beings can turn against one another. Erasmus warns us that this is often the fate of societies driven by greed or envy. In contrast, the Christian life has the power to transform “monsters” back into “gods” for one another. Isolation deprives us of the joy inherent in loving and being loved. As contemporary psychologist Larry Crabb puts it, “Connecting is life. Loneliness is the ultimate horror.” Separation is at the core of our struggles as human beings, whether from God or from one another. And what do we become when we separate even from ourselves?
Erasmus answers this concern with his proverb, reinforcing the idea of “Homo homini monstrum.” Without love and community, humans may devour one another, succumbing to a society driven by avarice or envy. Yet, the Christian life can redeem us, transforming “monsters” back into “gods” for each other.
While friends are rare, our longing for them is vital. If we grow cynical about finding true friendship, we risk either descending into madness or exploiting those around us, leading to something akin to the funeral difficulties encountered by Erasmus in his life.
Erasmus was a wanderer, living in nine different cities—far apart by sixteenth-century standards, particularly in an era when most people rarely traveled beyond their birthplace. He found stability late in life when he settled in Basel, Switzerland.
When he died in 1536, Erasmus was buried in the Basel Cathedral. Although he was denied Catholic last rites, he was admired for his scholarship by Protestants and criticized by Catholics for refusing to take sides. Some viewed him with suspicion as a proto-Protestant. According to Yale historian Roland Bainton, “He died as he lived, a lonely man, but honored by all Europe.” Interestingly, Erasmus, a Catholic priest, was interred in a Protestant cathedral. This situation highlights an important lesson about the consequences of not committing to a position during turbulent times, which I will discuss in a future video. His loneliness seems to have deepened as he neared death, at the same age I am now. What can he possibly teach us? With his objective scholarly perspective, combined with his painful experiences, Erasmus may have valuable insights to share.
Let’s ask Erasmus: Where do we find real friendship that helps us overcome disillusionment and loneliness? There is one final piece that completes our puzzle. In my next video in this short series, I will delve into Erasmus’s thoughts on community and where we can find authentic friendships.
Friends are essential, but they are rare. If we become disenchanted with our search for true friendship, we might either spiral into madness or exploit others. So, where can we find genuine friendships that help us overcome disillusionment and loneliness?
First, community is fundamental to our humanity. Erasmus asserted, “To live is to think with friends.” Engaging genuinely with others uplifts our minds and souls. We need to understand that we are designed for community, which is God’s plan for maintaining our humanity. Erasmus shared two critical insights on this topic. First, we are not merely victims of false friendships; we have also been insincere ourselves. Desiring an authentic life, we must be willing to take risks in a community filled with true but flawed friends, just like us. “To live is to think with friends.” He connects this idea to Christian fellowship: conversations with friends elevate the mind, just as the apostles lived in “one accord.” A life absent from this kind of community is but a shadow of true existence. This elevated community flips the script: “Man is a god to man.” Erasmus interprets this as the high calling of love, where one individual becomes “as a god” when they offer care, comfort, or wisdom to another. He aligns this notion with the Christian duty to be the hands of Christ to our neighbors. In community, we learn not only to seek friendship but also to be friends ourselves.
Erasmus had a clear purpose: he aimed for moral renewal and cultivated friendships within a network of like-minded individuals. Driven by curiosity, he explored libraries and universities, learning languages and literature as a means of engaging during the age of exploration.
Erasmus sought excellence, constantly striving to influence others until his death at the age of 70. His motivation stemmed from within; he loved his work and was dedicated to it wholeheartedly. While he was not wealthy, he enjoyed the freedom to create his own schedule and remained productive out of passion rather than the pursuit of financial gain. These were five of six internal motivations he possessed. But without the final internal motivation, the first five can still lead to isolation.
Despite his strong internal motivation and notable achievements, Erasmus faced loneliness due to his vows and the sacrifices he made for scholarship. Nevertheless, he acknowledged that community is vital for fostering care, sympathy, and encouragement, leading to his three key insights, which I will summarize here along with a conclusion:
1. True friendship is rare. Genuine friends challenge and enrich our lives, making friendship a divine gift rather than just a casual label.
2. Isolation carries dangers. Erasmus warned that solitude can lead to tyranny or madness; without love and community, humanity can become monstrous. The third insight will be our focus, as the rarity of friends and the peril of isolation present grave concerns.
3. Community is essential for thriving. Erasmus expressed a profound truth: “To live is to think with friends.” This sentiment highlights the transformative power of authentic engagement with others, uplifting our minds and nurturing our souls in ways that isolation cannot. While internal motivations are essential—such as purpose, curiosity, excellence, love for one’s work, and independence—they are insufficient on their own. One additional internal motivation is closely related to the external stimulus of the community: availability, also referred to as readiness.
This elevated sense of community has the potential to change the monstrous elements of life into something deeply meaningful. Erasmus insightfully pointed out that “Man is a ‘god’ to man,” implying that the high calling of love involves one individual serving as a source of joy and support for another. We must openly acknowledge our need for authentic relationships, embodying a willingness to give and receive within a circle of genuinely imperfect friends. Erasmus’s wisdom highlights a crucial internal motivation that appears to be lacking in our world: availability and readiness. A life lacking meaningful connections is merely a shadow of existence, devoid of the vibrancy and depth that authentic interactions provide.
This perspective aligns with the Christian duty to act as Christ’s hands on Earth, reminding us to cultivate genuine and purposeful friendships rather than superficial ones.
For those of us who endured the pandemic, isolation acted as an obstacle that hindered our full human potential. We have come to realize that we need a community to unlock the essential internal motivation: our willingness to be available to others. This willingness is only activated when we take the risk to build relationships.
Let me conclude with this: My family and friends in our village know that I use the Zettelkasten method to create a rich resource of information. This involves taking notes on fleeting thoughts and connecting them to form a complete picture of any project that piques my interest. I have developed a range of positive internal motivations that help me expand my collection. However, if I lack the final motivation—availability—I may be tempted to hoard my ‘collection.' “Nein,” said the inventor of this method, German sociologist Niklas Luhmann. "You do not want to be a hoarder." The purpose of this collection is to write, publish books and articles, produce videos, create art, write blogs, record podcasts, and generate many other resources to benefit others.
In the same way, we yearn for community to receive love and friendship, so that we can share our personal treasures for the benefit of others. Erasmus’s collection includes thousands of proverbs, but the half-dozen or so I've mentioned express a lonely scholar’s desire for friendship and a community that nurtures it. Erasmus hoped his ideas would help reform the Western Church into such a community, but other brilliant scholars, like his friend Philip Melanchthon, also took up that cause. Melanchthon admired many of Erasmus’s ideals but found that the divide between human peacemakers was too great, and the significant differences could not be reconciled in his lifetime. Although we have yet to realize an ideal community on Earth, many have discovered the joy of availability with the relatively few friends they have.
